We recently talked with a friend and pastor at our church named Steve who challenged us to learn how to dance. Of course with as much as Sean likes dancing, it is safe to assume that the dance is metaphoric. The dance is between our emotions and our intellect. Through conversations with us, he's learned that we have an "intellectual" slant on life, our marriage, and even our relationship with God. We had no problem agreeing with him because we find value in that view. Emotions get in the way. They skew reality. They can hold us back. He didn't disagree that it is healthy to keep a realistic view, but he also felt like we won't have a wholistic view on life without our emotions. They can bring life to living. As Steve shared, Sean had a bit of an epiphany that if we are all intellect and no emotions, we become legalistic. We act how we're supposed to. But if we're all emotions and no intellect, we become too zealous with a lack of boundaries and guidance. Steve also said that the longer we keep pushing our emotions down, the harder it can be to deal with them when they pop up unexpectedly. Thus, the dance is needed. And thus begins our struggle.
I think for a while now, Sean and I have learned how to survive by suppressing our feelings. Because if we let our feelings take over, then we won't be the people we want to become. We won't be the spouse that God has called us to be to each other. We won't follow through with our commitment to move to England because it hurts too much to leave the life that has been rooting itself in Vegas over the past 8 years. If we had let our emotions get in the way, then we wouldn't have been able to sell our home or our two vehicles or get rid of our pets. We wouldn't be able to look at the 30 or so boxes in our room and realize that that is what our home has been widdled down to. We wouldn't be able to watch our families grow up from a distance. But like Steve said...it's only a matter of time before those emotions begin to surface.
It's kind of like watching a clogged toilet slowly start to rise and then overflow. You stand there watching it, hoping to God that it will start to subside. And before you know it, you have a sopping wet mess to clean up. Recently, our "life toilets" have been rising and rising and have just started overflowing. There has been so much going on. We've had to begin processing the deep grief we have in leaving. We've been grieving hurt and conflict that we've seen in the people and ministries we care about. And to add insult to injury, we were on our way home from church tonight and we hit and killed a cat. Sean pulled off to the side of the road and we just hugged each other and cried. We cried for the cat. We cried for our hurting friends. We cried for the loss we're experiencing as we give up our life and identity in America. Our intellect is telling us that we have a life and a calling waiting for us in England, but our emotions are telling us that it hurts to leave because of the love we have here. I guess we're learning how to dance after all. Please pray for us as we continue to dance.
Sarah and Sean
Saturday, October 20, 2007
Tuesday, October 2, 2007
Transition Can Be Filled With Paradox
When we first returned from England, Sean and I had about 4 months before we would return. As we were re-adjusting to life back in Vegas we found ourselves saying, “What are we going to do for 4 months?” Now here we are just 6 weeks away from our final transition and we’re thinking, “Where has all the time gone?” Well, since our last update, a lot has happened and we’ve experienced the roller coaster ride we like to call “transition.” We have had times of rest and times of restlessness. Time to be poured into and time to pour out. Times of being ruled by our human nature and times of being led by the Holy Spirit. Times of feeling defeated and times of feeling victorious. Times of complacency and times of urgency. Times of reminiscing and times of looking forward. Here is a bit of what our roller coaster ride has looked like.
:: JULY
As I mentioned in our previous blog, our first official road trip was to California for my brother Gabriel’s wedding, and two weeks later we returned to spend a long weekend with Sean’s mom and step dad in Mission Viejo, CA. It was a great chance to catch up on our trip from England and to hear about their recent trip to Italy.
And as always when we go to visit mom, Sean had to pay a visit to the local Guitar Center. Usually he is only given the privilege of window shopping, but to Sean’s surprise I had agreed to an acoustic and amp upgrade. With music being a vital part of our ministry, with the help of our tax return, and with the condition that he sell his current amp and acoustic, Sean was able to walk out with a great deal on a Martin acoustic and a Line 6 amp. And he was able to sell both pieces of his old gear to one of the students in the youth group who was thrilled to receive them!
Another upgrade we were able to make was with our laptop. We were so blessed to be given our 12 inch Power Book from the church, but as technology has progressed they have begin phasing out the parts for this particular computer. So we agreed that a laptop upgrade was necessary. We were able to get a great deal on a computer that we feel has all the bells and whistles to last us a long time.
Both purchases were a huge blessing and weight off our shoulders because both have been put on the back burner for a while. With electronic purchases and musical gear being so expensive to purchase in England, we felt it was wise to move forward with both purchases.
:: AUGUST
August was a little less busy because we were in town the whole time. While in town, we tried to make it a priority to meet with as many current and potential supporters as possible. We had over 15 appointments that we were able to confirm.
We also had the responsibility of clearing out our 10x15 foot storage unit filled with the “bear essentials” that we thought we were going to be able to take with us to England. With the help and strength of our girthy friend Mitch and some students from the youth group, we were able to sort what we REALLY are able to take (about 25 boxes, a few pieces of small furniture and our mattresses). We sold the rest at a 2-day yard sale that our friends Adam and Laura hosted at their home. By the end of the yard sale, we were blessed with about $800! The rest of what we’re keeping but can’t take, my mom had agreed to pick-up and store at her home in Tucson. (We’ll tell of that “adventure” when we get to September.)
In August, Sean was also able to enjoy a chance serving with our weekend band and vocal team.
:: SEPTEMBER
Here is where things got a little hectic. Before we had even entered the month, September was already about 90% accounted for with out of town trips, visitors, and dinner appointments.
I was excited to have a chickBAND reunion. I was asked to partner with them to record one more song on their new album, and I was also able to play drums at an event to support an organization that helps with crisis pregnancies.
And as I mentioned, my mom was able to come to Vegas to pick up our belongings to store, but not without a wrench being thrown into the plans. My mom and her friend Robert were to come to Vegas with his truck and trailer, but the night before they were supposed to leave he was carjacked at gunpoint. Fortunately, he was not injured and they were still able to come and visit and pick-up our stuff, but we ended up paying for an unexpected $400 for a rental truck. But God is good and he was working through the hearts of those who care about us because my mom pitched in to help alleviate the cost along with our friends Adam and Laura. And Sean’s brother-in-law who works for Penske was able to get us a great rate on a rental. Once we were able to get past the stress of the situation, we were reminded that no matter what happens, God is able to take care of all of our needs…and he did!
Following my mom’s visit, Sean and I were scheduled to help lead worship at our weekend services. It was great to serve together.
The next thing on the calendar was a visit from 2 friends that we made during our Discipleship Training in England. Our friend Jake is from Colorado and Lis is from England. We had a blast taking them to Lake Mead, Hoover Dam, taking them to church, and of course showing them the Strip.
They were even able to share in the baptism of one of the students from the youth group.
After visiting for 5 days, we parted ways with Jake and headed BACK to California with Lis for a business and pleasure trip. We spent 2 days with Lis at Disneyland and California adventure using gift cards that were given to us as a parting gift from my job at Canyon Ridge last year. We had so much fun! We then parted ways with Lis and spent another 4 days with Sean’s mom. Sean’s sister also happened to be in town the same weekend, so we spent a little time with her as well. It was a good visit but a bit of a reality check kicked in as we realized that it would be the last time we see mom her for a while.
After leaving mom’s house, it was time for the business part of the trip…getting our visas at the UK embassy in Los Angeles. Praise God that everything went more smoothly than we could have hoped for. The process was as simple as turning in our applications in the morning and returning later on that afternoon to pick them up. While we waited for the apps to be processed, we were able to have lunch with my eldest brother Isaac. I don’t get to see him often so we treasured that time. The only thing that caught us off guard was the cost of the visas. The visa website didn’t have a cost breakdown, but said you could pay around a few hundred dollars per visa. When the charges rang up, it totaled about $420…for ONE! We paid $840 for our 2-year visas. And as we are learning, when wrenches get thrown into our plans, God is our provider and He has called us to this mission. We are learning more and more to put our trust in him through ALL circumstances.
Upon returning from this trip to California, we had about a day and a half before we returned for our last visit to California to spend some one-on-one time with my dad. We had a great time playing cards, checking out his new neck of the woods in Northern California, visiting the beach in Monterey, visiting San Francisco, and we even got to go to an air show!
In between each of the trips, we also kept busy with dinner and lunch appointments, rehearsals, and a going away party. One of the students from the youth group has decided to do a Discipleship Training School at the same location Sean and I did...Holmsted Manor in England! We have talked to him since his arrival to England and he is doing well. It is so exciting to have someone we know experiencing the same type of growth through the same program at the same location!
:: THANKSGIVING IN ENGLAND?
A huge task that Sean was able to accomplish during this time has been purchasing our tickets back to England. We were able to get a great rate of $337 per ticket. So our official departure date back across the pond is November 13…about 6 weeks away! This will be the first time we spend both the Thanksgiving and Christmas holiday away from family and friends and in another country. It’s time to say goodbye to old traditions, but this is an opportunity to create new ones.
:: BUDGET UPDATE
We wanted to celebrate that to date, we are almost 55% of our budget with almost a dozen families that have committed to giving but are still praying about a monthly amount. In addition, we have about another dozen families that we’ve asked to join our support team and they are in the process of praying through their decision. We are so thankful for our current partnerships and look forward to the new ones to come.
Whew! I think that is everything. Despite the craziness and the "bumps" we've hit, God has been faithful. We have our visas. We have our plane tickets. We have a growing support team. But we also still have a busy schedule ahead of us. We have a lot more follow up conversations to have, we have to finalize shipping the remainder of our belongings overseas, and we have three more out of town trips on the calendar: one to Colorado Springs, one to Philadelphia, and another to Arizona. Please pray that our momentum would continue to grow as we get closer to leaving. As always, thank you for taking an interest in our lives. We look forward to sharing the blessings that God will bring us through the month of October. Until next month…
Cheers!
Sarah and Sean
:: JULYAs I mentioned in our previous blog, our first official road trip was to California for my brother Gabriel’s wedding, and two weeks later we returned to spend a long weekend with Sean’s mom and step dad in Mission Viejo, CA. It was a great chance to catch up on our trip from England and to hear about their recent trip to Italy.
And as always when we go to visit mom, Sean had to pay a visit to the local Guitar Center. Usually he is only given the privilege of window shopping, but to Sean’s surprise I had agreed to an acoustic and amp upgrade. With music being a vital part of our ministry, with the help of our tax return, and with the condition that he sell his current amp and acoustic, Sean was able to walk out with a great deal on a Martin acoustic and a Line 6 amp. And he was able to sell both pieces of his old gear to one of the students in the youth group who was thrilled to receive them!Another upgrade we were able to make was with our laptop. We were so blessed to be given our 12 inch Power Book from the church, but as technology has progressed they have begin phasing out the parts for this particular computer. So we agreed that a laptop upgrade was necessary. We were able to get a great deal on a computer that we feel has all the bells and whistles to last us a long time.
Both purchases were a huge blessing and weight off our shoulders because both have been put on the back burner for a while. With electronic purchases and musical gear being so expensive to purchase in England, we felt it was wise to move forward with both purchases.
:: AUGUST
August was a little less busy because we were in town the whole time. While in town, we tried to make it a priority to meet with as many current and potential supporters as possible. We had over 15 appointments that we were able to confirm.
We also had the responsibility of clearing out our 10x15 foot storage unit filled with the “bear essentials” that we thought we were going to be able to take with us to England. With the help and strength of our girthy friend Mitch and some students from the youth group, we were able to sort what we REALLY are able to take (about 25 boxes, a few pieces of small furniture and our mattresses). We sold the rest at a 2-day yard sale that our friends Adam and Laura hosted at their home. By the end of the yard sale, we were blessed with about $800! The rest of what we’re keeping but can’t take, my mom had agreed to pick-up and store at her home in Tucson. (We’ll tell of that “adventure” when we get to September.)
In August, Sean was also able to enjoy a chance serving with our weekend band and vocal team.
:: SEPTEMBER
Here is where things got a little hectic. Before we had even entered the month, September was already about 90% accounted for with out of town trips, visitors, and dinner appointments.
I was excited to have a chickBAND reunion. I was asked to partner with them to record one more song on their new album, and I was also able to play drums at an event to support an organization that helps with crisis pregnancies.
And as I mentioned, my mom was able to come to Vegas to pick up our belongings to store, but not without a wrench being thrown into the plans. My mom and her friend Robert were to come to Vegas with his truck and trailer, but the night before they were supposed to leave he was carjacked at gunpoint. Fortunately, he was not injured and they were still able to come and visit and pick-up our stuff, but we ended up paying for an unexpected $400 for a rental truck. But God is good and he was working through the hearts of those who care about us because my mom pitched in to help alleviate the cost along with our friends Adam and Laura. And Sean’s brother-in-law who works for Penske was able to get us a great rate on a rental. Once we were able to get past the stress of the situation, we were reminded that no matter what happens, God is able to take care of all of our needs…and he did!
Following my mom’s visit, Sean and I were scheduled to help lead worship at our weekend services. It was great to serve together.
The next thing on the calendar was a visit from 2 friends that we made during our Discipleship Training in England. Our friend Jake is from Colorado and Lis is from England. We had a blast taking them to Lake Mead, Hoover Dam, taking them to church, and of course showing them the Strip.They were even able to share in the baptism of one of the students from the youth group.
After visiting for 5 days, we parted ways with Jake and headed BACK to California with Lis for a business and pleasure trip. We spent 2 days with Lis at Disneyland and California adventure using gift cards that were given to us as a parting gift from my job at Canyon Ridge last year. We had so much fun! We then parted ways with Lis and spent another 4 days with Sean’s mom. Sean’s sister also happened to be in town the same weekend, so we spent a little time with her as well. It was a good visit but a bit of a reality check kicked in as we realized that it would be the last time we see mom her for a while.
After leaving mom’s house, it was time for the business part of the trip…getting our visas at the UK embassy in Los Angeles. Praise God that everything went more smoothly than we could have hoped for. The process was as simple as turning in our applications in the morning and returning later on that afternoon to pick them up. While we waited for the apps to be processed, we were able to have lunch with my eldest brother Isaac. I don’t get to see him often so we treasured that time. The only thing that caught us off guard was the cost of the visas. The visa website didn’t have a cost breakdown, but said you could pay around a few hundred dollars per visa. When the charges rang up, it totaled about $420…for ONE! We paid $840 for our 2-year visas. And as we are learning, when wrenches get thrown into our plans, God is our provider and He has called us to this mission. We are learning more and more to put our trust in him through ALL circumstances.
Upon returning from this trip to California, we had about a day and a half before we returned for our last visit to California to spend some one-on-one time with my dad. We had a great time playing cards, checking out his new neck of the woods in Northern California, visiting the beach in Monterey, visiting San Francisco, and we even got to go to an air show!
In between each of the trips, we also kept busy with dinner and lunch appointments, rehearsals, and a going away party. One of the students from the youth group has decided to do a Discipleship Training School at the same location Sean and I did...Holmsted Manor in England! We have talked to him since his arrival to England and he is doing well. It is so exciting to have someone we know experiencing the same type of growth through the same program at the same location!
:: THANKSGIVING IN ENGLAND?
A huge task that Sean was able to accomplish during this time has been purchasing our tickets back to England. We were able to get a great rate of $337 per ticket. So our official departure date back across the pond is November 13…about 6 weeks away! This will be the first time we spend both the Thanksgiving and Christmas holiday away from family and friends and in another country. It’s time to say goodbye to old traditions, but this is an opportunity to create new ones.
:: BUDGET UPDATE
We wanted to celebrate that to date, we are almost 55% of our budget with almost a dozen families that have committed to giving but are still praying about a monthly amount. In addition, we have about another dozen families that we’ve asked to join our support team and they are in the process of praying through their decision. We are so thankful for our current partnerships and look forward to the new ones to come.
Whew! I think that is everything. Despite the craziness and the "bumps" we've hit, God has been faithful. We have our visas. We have our plane tickets. We have a growing support team. But we also still have a busy schedule ahead of us. We have a lot more follow up conversations to have, we have to finalize shipping the remainder of our belongings overseas, and we have three more out of town trips on the calendar: one to Colorado Springs, one to Philadelphia, and another to Arizona. Please pray that our momentum would continue to grow as we get closer to leaving. As always, thank you for taking an interest in our lives. We look forward to sharing the blessings that God will bring us through the month of October. Until next month…
Cheers!
Sarah and Sean
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